Anywho – had I any idea these accolades would be pouring in, I would have started doing this earlier and I’m sorry I kept my talents hidden from you for so long. And go check out Lucille, because she’s funny and only morons don’t like to laugh. Also. She talks about glitter farts. (I’m sorry I wrote “fart” Gidget, please don’t ground me.)
Oh – and for my faithful followers of Friday’s Pictures Page – do not fret. I will post not once, but TWICE today. Exciting, isn’t it?
The REAL Me – Q & A
1. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Psshh. Like I’m telling you all that. I do NOT need the paprazzi on my lawn right now. It would anger my neighbors in my super exclusive gated community, that is not exclusive or gated. Be content with knowing I say “y’all”. A lot.
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER SOMEONE? Nope.
3. IF YOU HAVE CHILDREN, HOW MANY DO YOU HAVE? 2 boys and 1 girl. Then SAH was neutered. (tee-hee)
4. HOW MANY PETS DO YOU HAVE? 2 Dogs, 2 cats, 2 turtles and a fat, drunk raccoon in the attic that a friend of mine named Jerry. (Jerry the Fat, Drunk Raccoon has his own blog post coming up soon.)
This is not Jerry. This is his nice, sober brother Dave.
5. YOUR WORST INJURY? At 8 or 9 I was climbing a chain link fence with Ritchie, who lived behind us (I loved playing with him – he was a year and half younger than me and did everything I told him too, including drinking “potions” made of dirt, water & bugs.) when I lost my footing and fell armpit first on the top part with the spikey x‘s. It may be a child’s memory, but I’m pretty sure that the 9 shots it took to deaden the area and then getting stitches in my armpit was more painful than childbirth.
6. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Sure. I have a lot. I can play the violin, the piano & the guitar, speak French & Spanish, ice skate, tap dance, ballet, jazz, bowl, softball, soccer, paint, act, and I can fly an invisible plane, am super strong and have these nifty bracelets that deflect bullets.*
(*these are actual lessons I took at some point growing up. I don’t do any of them well. Except for the last 3 – those weren’t really lessons I guess. Just me running around outside in my UnderRoos.)
7. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE THING TO BAKE? CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES. MMMMMmmmmmmm……
8. FAVORITE FAST FOOD? French Fries. From any where. That’s a lie. Sonic’s fries are gross. So are Arby’s. I hate to admit this because I am a southern girl who really likes her Whataburger fries, but I really like In-N-Out’s fries. Please don’t tell anyone I said that.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? In a heartbeat. LOVE stuff like that.
10. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? If they are happy and if not, if there’s anything I can do to make them happy. Also if they smell bad.
11. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Oh good grief, who knows? Everything makes me cry. Reading, commercials, tears of happy, tears of sad, tears of why do I have to ding dang cry all the time. (True Story: I love Les Miserables. LOVE. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen it on stage. I cried every time I watched a preview for the movie. But then I did the most nonsensical thing ever and CRIED THE ENTIRE MOVIE. Except the couple of times at laughed at Borat. One of BFF’s kept having to hand me Kleenex’s and it was embarrassing. I also cry every time the Jamaican Bobsled Team carries their bobsled over the finish line. If you don’t know what I’m talking about – don’t worry about it – I’m a dork.)
12. ANY CURRENT WORRIES? Seriously? You don’t have time to read all of that. Nobody does. =)
13. NAME 3 DRINKS YOU DRINK REGULARLY. Diet Dr. Pepper, Wine & Water. And I wish one of those said vodka, but I’m a total light weight.
14. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE BOOK? Too many to name. I love reading. I did spaz out the other night because Christopher Moore favorited one of my tweets. Woot! ::chair happy dance::
15. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE A PIRATE? How did you know?!?! I auditioned for Peter Pan this week with every intent of being the first female Smee in the world. I’ll settle for just a pirate though. I have to wait until June until I know anything. (Sigh)
16. FAVORITE SMELLS? I just decided this is the weirdest question ever, so I’m not answering it.
17. WHY DO YOU BLOG? Someone told me to. And I follow direction pretty well. Just don’t tell Super Awesome Husband about that – he doesn’t know.
18. WHAT SONG DO YOU WANT PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL? None. I don’t want a funeral. I want a party. And you play lots of songs at a party. Good songs too like LCD Soundsystem, The Eels, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Fatboy Slim and The Lumineers. Y’all rock out when I die. I’m serious.
19. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I’m a disorganized, forgetful mess.
20. FAVORITE HOBBY? Happy Hour. Wait. That’s says hobby – not hour. Oh well.
21. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A FRIEND? I don’t really know, but it fascinates me that all my best friends, including my sister, are Type A crazy list making people that help me keep it together.
22. NAME SOMETHING YOU’VE DONE THAT YOU NEVER THOUGHT YOU’D DO. Hugged Patrick Stewart. That was awesome.
23. FAVORITE FUN THINGS TO DO? Everything. I bring the fun with me. I’m a walking Party. I’m easily amused, distracted and can turn any mundane day into awesome fun.
24. ANY PET PEEVES? People who complain all the time about everything. GET OVER IT. Geez. Life is too short to be that unhappy all the time.
25. WHAT’S THE LAST THING THAT MADE YOU LAUGH? Myself. I crack myself up all the time. I’m my biggest fan. Also. I had 69 unread items in my inbox a minute ago and that number always makes me giggle like I’m an 8th grade boy.
Strange things are afoot at the Circle K…
Whew. That was a lot of typing.
Bloggers that I mentioned – none of you need this award – I just want others to be able to bask in your awesomeness. Or whatever it is you’ve got going on over there.
And The Very Inspiring Blog Award Goes To:
1. new2two.com - Funny and sweet Mom of twins blogs about life, her kiddos and her husband who I think is named Damnit Steve.
2. Drinking Tips for Teens – This is the first hilarious Canadian I’ve been obsessed with since Michael J. Fox. He’s a writer and a DARN good one. Check this sentence out: “The scientists sounded grumpy and full of corduroy.” I’m pretty sure it’s one of the funniest sentences ever written. Also. I think he has a polar bear.
3. The Return of the Modern Philosopher - Funny fake news stories that are 10 times better than the Onion and random ponderings. Also. I am trying to figure out how to make him help me write the screenplay for Goonies 2.
4. Twinisms - She’s already super famous. She’s even had a book written about her. BUT. She was my first fan. And if she ever’s comes to this part of the country, I’m going to make her hang out with me.
5. The Pursuit of Normal - Also fun/funny AND my first stalker. We’re going to Comic-Con in San Diego after I win the lottery.
6. Green Moms & Kids - Tons of info that I am finding very useful in trying to be more “green” in our family. Not great at researching that stuff, so I like it when other people do it for me!
7. The Dose of Reality – So supportive when I started this crazy blogging thing and great blogging to boot. They’ve got it going on. Even more so than Stacey’s Mom.